The Speed of Life

Is it just me or did April fly by? It seems like just yesterday I was updating the site for April. Now I have to do it again for May. I swear a week only takes 3 days for me now. When I was a child time would creep by. I was scared I would be a kid forever, now I am mortified that at that thought that my youth is quickly fleeting.

They say 30 is the new 20, but some days I feel ancient. I wonder if anyone has discovered a way to slow down time. I don't mean to stop and smell the roses. I mean to actually put 36 hours in a day. Now that would be progress! I could stay up later. Get more accomplished. Actually have the time (and energy) to work on my writing, plan for the site, enjoy the forum, oh and I would scrapbook too. It is not like I have many demands on me, so seriously where does the time go?

Fifteen Hundred Dollars!!!

OK I just looked up those scrapbookers armoire things. HMMM 1500 dollars! They seem so small at that price. The creating station seems nice and very furniture like. But the pull out table part seems really small. This one has larger table space, but the color is really ugly. And how do you get to all the stuff with that table like that? Do you have to get up and walk around it?

The scrapbox looks awesome. But there still doesn't seem like a lot of room to sit and work. But I guess I am a sucker for velcro and plastic...and black. Anything that comes in black makes me happy. Some have said that it is not worth 1600 dollars though.

I need a fairy godmother to come and whip one up for me. Or a skilled carpenter that works for peanut butter sandwiches.

To Scrap or To Clean? That is the question.

I rearranged my scraproom over a month ago and things are worse now than they were before. I cannot find a thing. I know I need to stop take a day and just clean it all up, but if I do that then I won't have time to scrap. I have such little scrapping time as it is. I offered my sister 20 dollars to help me clean it, and surprisingly she said yes. She must have seen the desperation in my eyes, since she usually would have requested a much higher amount.

Now I may have to move out of my scraproom temporarily. My grandmother sold her house and may have to stay with us, until her new senior housing is ready. This seems like the perfect opportunity to organize. I have been seriously thinking about investing in one of the scrapper's closets or armoire thingies. I wonder if a whole room of stuff would fit. I just think that a smaller controlled space would force me to get organized. And I could have it in the family room or the kitchen - where the action is - perhaps that will motivate me to scrap more often.

The Price of Passion

I am childfree so the demands on my time are not so obvious. My job is very low-key so I don't feel worn out or tired at the end of my day. My husband and I work opposite shifts so we rarely see each other for longer than a few hours per day. So then why do I feel like I am being pulled from so many directions?

I think this may be the price of passion. When I get involved in a project, I immerse myself in it completely. It consumes my life, sometimes to the detriment of other obligations. I just have this overwhelming need to work work work until a project is done. I don't want to stop and take a break, I don't want to save some for later - I want it done - NOW.

I am beginning to think this may not be the best policy. My little brother will be 19 this week and I have not even considered what to get him for a gift. I have had the same Netflix dvd sitting on my shelf for almost two months, untouched, because I have no time to watch TV. My brother and sister want to go to NYC on Friday and I am cringing inside because I feel like I have no time to goof off in the city. My husband has grown his hair out. When did this happen?

The scary part is that I know I need to slow down. I know how terribly fleeting life is. I will never get back all this time I chose to focus on my passions. But even when I snap out of my frenetic pace for a bit, my mind is still racing, still thinking about all that needs to be done. How do you stop your mind?

I am getting no answers from writing all this. Maybe because I know that I should be doing something else. My mind is still racing. I hope when this next set of deadlines ends I will be able to stop and savor the moments. Who am I kidding? I thrive at this pace. Would I still be me if I slowed down?

Back from CKU - it's Design Team time!

It seems like I have been gone forever. My Cathy Z album track was awesome. Cathy has such a wonderful personality and spirit. It was really fun being in a class with her. My tablemates for that class were really cool too. Big shout-outs to my girls at the table in the back corner! I hope you all finished your albums.

There was a scrapbooking group from Chicago at CKU together. They had such cute matching pink and brown sweatsuits. Scrap on Sistahs! It makes me long for a club I can join in my area. I want to wear matching shirts too. :) Maybe we all can have matching shirts at Diversity Designs. Granted, we are all spread out across the country, but at least I would know someone somewhere matched me.

Speaking of Diversity Designs...the design team call is officially over. Finally, we can get to the good part - selecting our team. We have received so many amazing submissions it is going to be so hard for us to narrow it down. We are actually contemplating expanding the team a bit, to accommodate more talented artists.

It is so good to be back! I had a great time in Chicago, but I am oh so tired. I can't wait until the weekend so I can relax and renew.

Cramming for CKU

I feel like I am back in college cramming for finals. I have officially reached the 11th hour. I am leaving for CKU tomorrow and I just started the homework for the album track!! I know I am a procrastinator, but even I am appalled at myself. I guess I just couldn't get motivated to journal. Every time I tried to get started I became sidetracked. I don't want to force anything, because then the album will ring false. I am now completely overwhelmed as I stare at a blank word document.

I have decided to let myself off the hook. I love myself too much to get so stressed about what is supposed to be a fun weekend. I have decided to just do as much as I can, and not worry about the things I can't finish. Now that I am relaxed, I am actually getting more done. Amazing.

My Musical Map

I am a really big music fan. My tastes are all over the place. I have been thinking about diversity 24/7 these days. I am a profile in diversity. Not for the obvious reasons - my gender, my culture, my race, my hubby - but because my tastes in all things wander the globe. Especially my music. I just stared at my CD collection this morning (yep I am old school. I even still have cassettes, that I refuse to get rid of) and I noticed how eclectic it was. I have 80's hair band Poison next to 90's Euro-popsters Ace of Base, next to The Best of 2 Live Crew, next to a big band compilation.

The changes of my life can be mapped out in this collection of audio recordings. I went through phases where I loved all things metal, then I wanted to become a club kid so I have a nice range of dance mixes, then I wanted to be "deep" because I was about to go to college so I have alternative stuff. Of course, there are the albums I own because some boy I had a crush on was really in to the group, so in my attempts to garner his attention I bought something I really didn't like. Or the albums I had to have because everyone had them too. Peer pressure can be the most cruel when you are forced to spend money on Kokomo by the Beach Boys.

My list of the Top 10 Artists that are Profiles in Diversity (in no particular order)

Black Eyed Peas - They are all over the place musically. Are they conscious rappers or fun loving pranksters? Then with the addition of Fergie...I am still not sure where to categorize them.

Prince he just may be the human personification of diversity.

Linkin Park - Rock and Rap merge in this multicultural band. Faint is one of my all time favorites.

Aretha Franklin - the woman sang opera on the Grammys when Pavarotti was ill.

Madonna - she is like a chameleon. I love how she created herself and morphed with the times. Did anyone ever expect Madonna to make a CD like Ray of Light?

Speaking of morphing with the times... LL Cool J. What other rapper has remained this successful throughout the years. I think he may have 3 generations of fans.

Santana - Do I need to explain?

Rod Stewart - Rock, pop, disco, now standards. I am HUGE fan.

Red Hot Chili Peppers - They rap, they rock...I can play them when I want to be mellow or when I want to dance. Very cool.

Ice-T - Isn't it ironic that a rapper who had a rock band (Body Count) that openly criticized the police, plays a cop on SVU? I smirk every time I watch him on that show.

The inability to color within the lines

I attempted to do a challenge posed on the forum today. Basically it was do a layout with a picture on a tag. Simple right? I guess not for me. No matter how much I plan I can never do things according to set guidelines. I truly had intended to use a tag, but somehow the page took on a life of its own. It is the same problem when I try to scraplift. I have never been successfully able to take a page I loved and adapt it for my own album. I guess my mind is too rebellious to follow a set pattern.

Finding my inspiration in a pop song

I just finished a pre-Cku Chicago circle journal with the theme "Where do you find your inspiration?" Of course I answered that I don't really have any inspiration, I just stare at the page until something comes to me. And that is true. Lately, though I have been starting to notice the world around me and how it could translate into my art.

I have not found many instances of visual inspiration that could help my layouts but I have found things that inspire my journaling. Take song lyrics for instance. I was listening to the words of Natasha Bedingfield's song "Unwritten". Talk about inspiring. That whole song could fill up a layout. But there was one line that struck me:

"I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We've been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can't live that way"

That is so me! This is about so much more than scrapbooking. This is like an inspiration for life. Are we really living if we don't dare to fail? Are we really scrapping if we don't dare to use our prettiest papers?

Yep, I am back to paper again. I have this real fear about using my favorite papers in my stash. What if I make a mistake and it is ruined? Sure I could go buy more, but that is not the point. Logic is clearly not working for me on this issue. I am going to take Natasha's advice and feel free to use some of that Basic Grey I have been collecting instead of cropping. My hands are shaking, but I am determined. Wish me luck.

2006 HOF - the Oscars of the scrapbooking world?

There is such a frenzy of enthusiasm over at 2peas. The 2006 CK Hall of Famers have been revealed. It is so exciting, and I didn't even enter. Congrats to all.

These types of contests are such a great way to celebrate the work of talented artists. It really got me thinking there should be more "awards" like the HOF or Memory Makers Masters. In the film industry there are countless awards given that lead up to the Academy Awards. Films are given many opportunities to shine and be seen. And that is what awards are really about EXPOSURE. Artists in all mediums appreciate that.

The cogs in my brain are turning... I will have to revisit this one day.

Here I am: The Beginning

I can't believe I started a blog. I have been resistant to it for so long. One would think an opinionated, passionate person like myself would be the first person to join the blog train. But really I didn't want the stress. I just knew that if I had a blog where I ranted and raved at will, I would be forever on my soapbox. Too much grandstanding can be tiring.